Summary: Lee Chaolan has many pleasures in life, but the best of them is fooling his brother.
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Kazuya Mishima grinned in grim satisfaction as the GPS coordinates clicked closer and closer to his destination. 30.0994 North, 85.3045 West – close. So close.
“Anna,” he said, and she looked up from her smartphone.
“Read me the electronic mail again.” He stared at the map, transfixed as it wordlessly updated their coordinates in his hands without him ever having to press a button.
“Sir, you could just – “
“Read it to me, woman. I am occupied.” He was not going to try to figure out how to read emails on the tiny little screen. He had neither a need nor a desire to be seen as available to be contacted by his public.
Besides, watching the numbers move on the map was more amusing.
“Dear Mr. Mishima,” Anna sighed, clearing her throught before diving into the well-read email once more. “I hope you are well. I saw your purple suit with the red cravat in your interview on C-SPAN the other day and it moved me. I have hesitated upon giving you this information, afraid that I might face reprisals from the Mishima Zaibatsu. However, after seeing your stunning outfit and hearing your expertly crafted argument against Mr. Kazama, I now feel comelled to give you this information. I live near your golden headquarters, and the Mishima Zaibatsu has been slowly building their troops here for a while. They mean to take your headquarters in one all out assault. Their troops are currently stationed at 33.0939° N, 84.5739° W, including Mr. Kazama. It is my hope that you and your purple suit can use the coordinates I provide. I will be watching in hopes of truly excellent results.
Kazuya said nothing when she finished reading, merely watching as the numbers climbed closer and closer the information that Number 1 had provided. He wouldn't normally go out on a limb on untested information, but the voice had sounded so...familiar. He couldn't quite place it, but he knew it was reliable.
Anna waited a moment for praise, and, when she did not get it (Kazuya had long ago learned that happy employees were useless employees), she sighed and went back to her annoying game, which beeped and blooped annoyingly every time she hit a pig with some kind of deformed bird that she'd forced to fly into a collusion.
Flying, he thought, definitively did not work like that. There had been times in his joyrides with Devil as a teenager that he had wished for some pork to fall from the sky, but --- alas.
As the coordinates matched those he'd long ago memorized, he grinned in satisfaction. Soon. HE opened the door to the plane.
“I shall rendezvous with you on the ground, woman. If you run into Kazama before me, execute plan number 563.”
“But sir – “
“Do it, woman!” He snapped. Jin would certainly be thrown off by her donning a Gon costume; if he couldn't get a god damn dinosaur with boxing gloves (thanks stringent animal experimentation laws, he thought, and made a not to bribe his way into the FDA), he would get someone to dress as one. At least then he would get the second best distraction method he could find.
He enjoyed the feel of the air racing through his hair as he jumped out the door. There really was no better reward for selling your soul than getting wings, he thought.
Really made being one Satan's minions worth it.
He landed on his feet and dusted himself off. He opened his smartphone for a moment to open his favorite app, the mirror one. Ah, he'd used just enough product: not a hair out of place.
He looked around. There were quite a few less tanks than he had imagined; perhaps he'd pressed the Zaibatsu's military vehicles too hard in Thailand. Less foot soldiers too.
He walked further toward a town; he could hear a lot of voices, and...music?
Far too early for the victory celebration, son, he thought, his lips pulling into a smirk. He'd learned that lesson with Heihachi.
He came upon the opening of a village. There was an inn in the distance, and his eyes glanced toward the sign. He'd need to take note of the place where he'd defeated his son for the first...er...last…. Time.
Welcome to the town of Gay.